June 29, 2015

Not a fantastic day today, but not a bad one. I have been able to get up and walk most of the time. Supposed to have a radiation scan today so no food, and it seems like I am hungry all the time. The funny thing is, I don't usually get hungry.

            Other than that, same kind of maintenance throughout the day. No changes there. I will say, I have finally gotten over my fear of needles. One thing accomplished!

            Nothing much to do but talk with Riley and my roommate Debbie. She is a real kick and keeps my laughing. I think she said she was a comedian in Ely, and I believe it. She can see the light side of everything.

            They cancelled the scan so finally, the nurse said if I ate real fast I could have dinner, but nothing after 8 PM because they were rescheduling for tomorrow. Didn't know I could wolf down dinner so fast. Figure I had better take advantage of it, I know that my near future holds, upset stomach, not wanting to do anything but sleep. But that will only be temporary. Until then I will enjoy the day God gave me the best I can.
             They did take me down for a MRI. Have you ever had an MRI. I knew that I was a little claustrophobic, but wow! Never ever EVER again! It wasn't too bad when it was making noise, (other than I felt like I had been thrown under a train), when it got quite the lady doing the test would talk to me, and if I kept my eyes closed I was ok. It was supposed to take about 45 minutes. Oh my God! No! I can't do this!! I was good for 30 minutes, which I felt was an accomplishment. She gave me a little red bulb to pump if I had to get out and pump it I did on the last go around. I think my heart was going to jump right out of my chest I was so scared. Well, that's over thank goodness.

            The hospital filled out paperwork for me to help pay the bill. That took some of the pressure off. Not sure what all I signed, but I need all the help I can get right now. I need to focus on what is going to happen and how to get well. But need some kind of insurance to do that. Nothing is for free. Funny how there is so much help out there advertised until you tell them you are not a millionaire and have no insurance. Too young for Medicare and not eligible for Obama Care.  Is this where I say I am screwed? No, there will be a way to fix this, just have to keep positive no matter how hard it is.

            I am so proud of our children, our grandchildren and Riley. They are keeping an upbeat attitude for me and that helps a lot. I don't have the strength to hold us all up anymore so they are holding me. (oh man! that made me cry!) A good day, a bad day but all in all another blessed day.